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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29028900">A bear walks into a doggie door</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Builder/pseuds/Builder'>Builder</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Canon ships and all that jazz [14]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Humor, BAMF Laura Barton, F/M, Humor, POV Clint Barton</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 03:55:35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>949</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29028900</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Builder/pseuds/Builder</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Laura calmly lifts her head, the baby beginning to doze against her chest.</p><p>Clint grits his teeth, mentally preparing for a lecture on overworking himself, or letting work frustration get to his head, or something of the sort, but instead she says, “Clint?  Can you get the bear out of the doggie door?”</p><p>Clint slowly looks up.  “Babe... What?”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Clint Barton/Laura Barton</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Canon ships and all that jazz [14]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/951702</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>A bear walks into a doggie door</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p></p><div class="">
  <p>Their version of spending the evening together hasn’t been so interesting lately.  Laura sits on the living room sofa bouncing the baby, and Clint rests in the upright recliner, pouring over a SHIELD file spread across his knees.  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>It’s getting late; the older kids have been in bed for a while now, and it’s far past time for Nathaniel to be over his nightly fuss.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“There’s my boy.  There’s my boy,” Laura coos softly</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Clint doesn’t know whether to be irritated or exhausted.  He only got home in time to kiss Lila and Cooper goodnight, and now he’s reading over papers that’ll send him away for another three days at least.  He needs time with his family.  He needs time alone with his wife.  He needs a fucking shower.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Clint blinks down at the file and realizes he’s read the same sentence four times without taking in a word of it.  He thinks about packing the pages back into their manila folder, but putting off the work is more distasteful than just getting it done.  Clint exhales, ruffling the papers slightly, and starts reading about his next target’s occupation for the fifth time.  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Laura calmly lifts her head, the baby beginning to doze against her chest.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Clint grits his teeth, mentally preparing for a lecture on overworking himself, or letting work frustration get to his head, or something of the sort, but instead she says, “Clint?  Can you get the bear out of the doggie door?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Clint slowly looks up.  “Babe... What?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Um...”  Laura points her chin in the direction of the front entryway.  It’s dark and shadowy, since the only lights on are in the living room, but Clint can distinctly see a pair of glowing eyes and a long snout invading the lower portion of the door.  Right where the flap for the doggie door ought to be.  The one he added during last weekend’s run of family fix-its.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You sure that’s not what’s-his-name?” Clint asks.  “Roberto? That collie from down the road?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Since when does a collie travel over ten miles to come visit us?”  Laura shakes her head.  “Look at its ears.  That’s a bear.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Clint does examine the creature’s ears.  They’re small and round in an adorable way, compared to its gigantic head.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Oh, yeah,” Clint acquiesces.  “That’s a bear...”  He eases the file out of his lap and onto the coffee table, then gets to his feet.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Be careful,” Laura says, shifting the baby slightly as if to obscure his vision, just in case a fight were to break out.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Well, you said to get rid of it,” Clint says, a hint of accusation in his voice.  He heads to the kitchen and reaches for the bow and quiver he’s left slung over the back of a chair.  “I’ve got explodables...”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“What’re you doing?  Don’t kill it!”  Laura looks aghast.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I’ll, uh, scare it,” Clint decides, hurriedly putting the quiver back and taking only the bow.  “I’ll fire a blank.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Ok...”  Laura sounds unsure.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You told <em>me</em>...” Clint starts.  “I’m trying here.”  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He tucks his bow against his body in a preparatory position and sprints for the entryway.  Getting as close as he dares, Clint drops to his knee, aims the empty bow at the animal’s snout, and pulls back on the string.  “Get out of here, you,” he mumbles just before he releases it.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>The loud twang of the bowstring rips through the air, but besides that, nothing happens.  Clint’s heart pounds for a few seconds, then he lets out his breath.  So does the bear, filling the air with a gamey smell and offering Clint a momentary glimpse of sharp ivory teeth.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Well, that was...”  Clint shakes his head, wondering what to try next.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>The sound of bare footsteps comes up behind Clint, and Laura bustles to the front, the baby on her hip and a large maglite in her hand.  “I got this,” she says.  “Take Nate?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“O-ok,” Clint agrees immediately, throwing his bow back over his shoulder and taking his small son in his arms.  “What’re you gonna--”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Laura flips on the flashlight and shines it directly into the bear’s eyes.  The animal groans in discomfort, blinking and tucking its chin.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Now go back where you came from, bear,” Laura says, turning the light on and off in an almost sizure-inducing strobe pattern.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Wowza.”  Clint has to squint to keep his own eyes from watering.  He presses Nate’s head gently into his collarbone and shield’s the baby’s eyes too.  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>The bear seems to have the same thought.  The entire door rattles on its hinges as the animal pulls its head forward and backward a few times.  Then, with a mighty groan and a mightier tug, it manages to free itself and go stumbling backward down the porch steps.  The resulting wooden crunch makes Clint sure he’ll have some repairs to do later, but for now he’s just grateful the bear’s gone on its way.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Wow,” Clint breathes as Laura turns off the maglite.  “Babe.  That was...”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“One for the record books.”  Laura shakes her head, barely controlling a laugh.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Yeah.”  Clint lets his face break into a smile as well, relieved both with the bear’s exit and his wife’s reaction.  “Let’s plan something better for tomorrow night, ok?  I’m probably gonna have another mission soon, and...”  He realizes a second too late that he’s ruined the mood.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Ok.”  Laura leads the way back into the living room.  “Something better tomorrow,” she agrees.  “But you have to admit, I don’t think we’ll ever have another night like tonight.”  She gives Clint a sly look.  “Especially if you cover up that doggie door when you fix the porch in the morning.”</p>
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